May 16, 2006
Yesterday afternoon and evening
I had this persistent headache
that came and went
but would never fully go away
At one point I lay in a lukewarm bath
with the lights off and only the lamp from the hall
That helped
As I looked around the room in the dimness
I saw our two washcloths hung up differently
mine hanging down, his folded over
and that led me to think about how we are different
and separate though so much connected
And I thought of the old couple turned into side-by-side trees in the greek myth
the idea being that they have grown together so their branches intertwine
And I imagined that sometimes it’s hard to tell where one stops and the other starts
but that at other times
in the late autumn say
always assuming these are deciduous trees we’re talking about here
it would be quite easy to see which was which
I thought maybe this would be a good image for the opening of a novel
about an old person looking back on his or her marriage
but then again maybe it was sort of trite
I also listened to the water drip
and to the bubbles in the bubblebath pop
to the noises of the building around me
pipes rattling and footsteps mostly
voices
laughter
The very aspect of apartment living that bothers so many people
everyone stacked up one on top of another
I realized is to me a comfort
It makes me feel safe even when I’m hurting
a cocoon of anonymous humanity wrapped protectively around me
image source is here
